Better Parenting

It's been a week or so since I said good-bye to the daily perusing of Facebook. After messaging my most commonly interacted with friends, removing the app from my phone, and archiving my photos I signed off keeping it up only for the occasional update or non-time sensitive message. Without the 'book I've been interacting much more a home as I had hoped. I play more with Aurora, pay attention when Matt and I watch a movie, and work on my knitting skills (or lack there of). In the mornings though, before Aurora and Matt are awake, and on nights like these when they are both asleep I take some time to get online. With no Facebook to read I turn to, dare I say it, actual news. I've learned a slew of interesting things like the EPA says the average American home throws away 4 lbs of waste a day, but a university did a study and it is actually 7 lbs. Both these numbers are shocking to me and I plan to track and weigh our waste next week to see where we stand. Look for another post on how that works out in the future. I also learned Kansas is a top wind energy producer, go us, and that Steven Colbert's mother is ill, sadness :( But, the article that cause particular inspiration for this post was on parenting. Josette Crosby, a Huffington Post blogger posted this article:  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/josette-crosby-plank/french-parents-better_b_1281984.html titled Why ALL Parents are Better Than You.

The article really made me laugh. Lately, I've been totally over the parenting related researching. The over analyzing of tiny details, the debate that usually ensues, the energy that goes into it just to come up the answer that I would have all along if I just listened to my instincts on the thing. I'm just going to label my parenting style as 'instinctual parenting' and just be done with it. For some reason, and I am sure many of my mommy friends agree, I define myself in large part by my parenting. I love the choices I made for my family, but that doesn't mean they have to be the choices for you family. Just like how I get so upset when people assume I am stay-at-home, assume that since I work in an office I am a secretary. or that I don't know how to make a cabinet because I am a girl. This doesn't mean I am a homemaker-hater or scowl at administrative staff! If you are either and are happy way to go you! It just isn't accurate to who I am at this very moment and I want people to understand who I am for some reason. Because my identity is important to me. That doesn't mean you have to be my clone to be cool in my eyes. Far from it! Be who you are and share who you are with me. I am sure I will be excited to learn about it. 

So, when reading the article's list I couldn't help but pick out the lines the described me. Usually, I'm not all about the labels, but tonight, let's go on a label fest. Label yourself - if you will - what kind of parents match you on this list? When you look at your list don't you totally think, 'ya, my list is the shit, I am awesome'? I hope so, because you are awesome and sometimes you need a little bit of inner cockiness wrapped up inside all that humble-ness. It's only good for our self-esteem right? 

My parenting list: 

1. Laid Back Parents
2. Suburban Parents who have Backyards, Good Schools, and Soccer Coaches From Brazil
3. Country Parents whose kids Learn Responsibility by Running Large Farm Equipment and Who Know Exactly What To Call The Chicken Hole That Eggs Come From - I am leaving this since we are soon-to-be country bound! 
4. Parents who vaccinate
5. Parents who don't vaccinate - oOOo I get to be both since we selectively vaccinate
6. Parents who allow their kids as much contact with germs as possible in order to build up their immune system and keep their kids healthy
7. Breastfeeding Parents
8. Parents who don't know whether or not God can help them be better parents
9. Liberal Parents - hey, there was no 'moderate parents' label. I guess the blogger assumes it is safe to say all parents are better than moderates lol! 
10. Free Range Parents - oh how I try, my worrier parent comes out though. 
11. Natural Parents
12. Unplugged Parents
13. Parents who don't allow cell phones at the age you gave your kid a cell phone - [psht...I am totally waiting until after your kid gets a phone so I can be *this* parent. Mwhahah]
14. Authoritative Parents
15. Positive Parents
16. Dr. Sears
17. "I Hate Ezzo" Parents
18. Younger Parents
19. Parents of only children
20. Parents who pick up crying kids
21. Parents who co-sleep
22. Parents who don't spank
23. Parents who care enough about their kids to send them to homeschool
24. Parents who birthed their kids vaginally
25. Straight Parents
26. Married Parents
27. Parents with a high school diploma
28. Parents with a college degree
29. Parents who read parenting books
30. Crafty Moms
31. Parents who blog about their kids
32. Parents who update all their kids' baby books
33. Uber Moms
34. Type A Moms
35. Parents who get down on the floor and play with their kids
36. Parents who get down on the floor and teach their kids
37. Parents who teach their kids to put in flooring 
38. Parents who work outside the home
39. Parents who are at home outside
40. Parents who let their kids drink from the garden hose outside

Ones that should be added: 

1. Parents that don't allow HFCS and artificial food coloring

2. Minimalist Parents 

3. Anti-Commercialism Parents 

4. Anti-Circumcision Parents 

5. Extended Rear Facing Parents 

6. Parents who let their kids come out in public and *gasp* act like kids.

My favorites on the list that I wasn't: 

Parents with no fancy book learning

-and-

Parents who birthed their kids vaginally with no help in a rain forest on the summer solstice - please someone I know, be this awesome parent so I may live vicariously through you on this one. 

Dearest Friends! Who are you? What do you identify most with in life? What are you proud of? Share it with me so when I see you next I can be like, 'oh hey, heard you were bad ass at that one thing, tell me about it' Trust me, it will be great. 

2012 Update

Well, a whole month has passed! How are we doing on our resolutions?

1. Pay offs. Welp due to a couple medical emergencies in 2011 we had a few thousand in medical bills. It happens, eh. But, yay we will have these paid off this month and will also paid a chunk on the credit card. Whoot Whoot!

2. We have paid our dues for Sierra Club and started our United Way deduction for TARC and CASA. I am glad I specially selected CASA since United Way is only sending specific donations to them right now. WTF United Way. After working with you all for a couple years and then this I am not too impressed with you right now! But, back to the point, we have not yet paid our dues to La Leche for the year or API.

2. Apparently I had two 2s on my original list. The second '2' was regarding contributing time. I haven't gotten to work on this yet. The night I signed up for harvesters was cancelled, bummer. It is really hard to go there anyways as they don't allow Aurora. I need to remember them for donations when I go to the store and need to make some snacks for Ronald McDonald. I haven't found a way to donate crochet/knit things, but I know there are options out there. Any ideas?

3. I have attended the first Sierra Club meeting of the year. I have yet to attend a La Leche though I really need to so I can talk about leadership opportunities. I am definitely meeting my quota of Fiber Fridays which I LOVE LOVE. Tonight it was at our place even. Matt and Rory have been going to at least one playgroup a week and we have had one parents as teachers visit this year. Story times haven't happened yet, but I hope so soon. Last but not least I have become an active member of the wellness center and make it down several times a week for Yoga class and personal fitness.

4. I am being friendly. Tomorrow is another sewing class with my sissy. The first class we made a swiffer duster and I believe this time we are making a casserole cozy. I have also taken Matt out on a date to the movies and the Burger Stand for some Foosball and pool...and truffle fries, can't forget the fries.

5. So, the certification I need to work for requires I log 1500 hours of project management before taking the exam. I feel like this may not happen in a year. I am taking a course in SQL online, but it is just through work. College course next semester? IDK, haven't decided.

6. Matt and I did not end up attending the finance classes because my dad ended up in the hospital the night they started and so we had no one to care for Aurora and honestly bigger things to worry about. We have read through the books at home though and are working out a better cash management/budget system. I have a meeting this month with Learning Quest for Aurora as well.

7. We definitely take waste more into account and Matt has reported a significant decrease in our landfill waste, but we aren't what I would call zero waste. Some of it is having to be a balance for us. Do we have the ability to buy from the bulk section and make everything from scratch, yes. It that feasible with our schedule and level of involvement in other things, no. Don't get me wrong, we make a TON of things from scratch, but it is winter and I am going to eat tomato soup dang it. I am not going to cook it from scratch, and I am not going to eat out of a can. Yes, the can would be recycled where as the carton would not, but it would also leech BPA. No thank you. Health comes first.

8. It hasn't become nice enough weather for us to fulfill a new level of involvement in nature. We do plan to do the warrier dash in KC though so conditioning for that and looking for either some tournaments for co-rec softball or a league to get on with a team.

9. We are maintaining minimalism and have really internalized it. I can tell we have because we don't feel the urge to buy, buy, buy anymore. Even Matt! There just isn't a ton of stuff we need or want which is so freeing. I haven't unplugged though. Still addicted to the electronics. I am just going to have to force myself by downgrading my phone moving to the country. Yay, I am dead serious. I have done some DIY projects, but not the 12 yet. I have made a crayon roll for Aurora's new beaswax crayons and a baby alpaca scarf in the very particular style my mom wanted.

10. We have set a goal to be move out to the farm by July. We will be in my parent's home until the house is built which suits us just fine. That will allow us to save more and be on site for planning and building. We have a floor plan and a good design. We need to get the details ironed out and set a budget so we can set a good time line. Our thoughts are 1-2 years so it is happening sooner than we thought when we set our resolutions, yay!

Overall I am proud of us. We have tackled a lot and I feel we are succeeding quite well. Life is good.